My husband and I just had our 29^th anniversary. It’s a little bit shocking. I don’t see how I’m old enough to have been married for that long, but there it is.

We didn’t do anything big to celebrate. I mean, 29 is not a big celebration year. At this point it’s more about the round numbers, and maybe the 5’s. But really, we’ve never done big anniversary celebrations.

We’ve cancelled plans because of a sick child; we’ve said a quick “happy anniversary” as we headed to our respective duties at Cub Scout meetings; we’ve bought new tires. You’ll say we’re just crazy romantics, but we can’t help ourselves.

When we got married, my paternal grandmother told me – in a tone of complete seriousness, mind you – that the first 25 years were the hardest. Young me found that statement to be endlessly amusing. The first 25 years? How could I even imagine that far ahead? And how could two people be married that long without everything being worked out and smoothed over years ago? It was ridiculous…

Now, having left that unimaginable milestone in the dust, I can confidently report one thing, Mamaw. The past 4 years haven’t exactly been a piece of cake.

Here’s what young me didn’t know – she didn’t know that the two people who got married on that day so many, many years ago are not the same people who just had a 29^th anniversary. In fact, they weren’t even the same people who had a 1^st anniversary. They were both still learning and changing and growing. I thought we had reached adulthood; I thought he and I were the people we would always be. I had no idea that we were only just beginning.

Every year there are new tests to work through, new trials to smooth over. The challenges we’ve faced, and the decisions we’ve made, have changed us. I’m grateful that the challenges have not been overwhelming, but they haven’t stopped coming, either. So there are always new people in this marriage together, newly committed to keeping it working.  

For many years, my favorite passage of scripture has been I Corinthians 13, the love chapter. My favorite section begins with verse 7.

“It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

We’re not there yet; we certainly haven’t perfected the always and the never, but we’re still trying. Young me may have been naïve, but 29 years ago she did a couple of things right. She married a very good man. And she had the words Love never fails engraved inside his wedding band.

Here’s to still working on that. Happy anniversary, sugar.